For years, whenever I wanted to fully express the abject monotony of a mind-numbingly tedious task, I drew upon the comparison of buying a pack of socks. How wrong I was. Humbled now, wrung by a recent shopping ordeal, I determined that never again will I discount so lightly an undertaking which, far from being [...]
Archive for May, 2012
Lost in the Box Store — Where Are the Socks?
May 31st, 2012
2 Comments
Posted in humor, Middle Aged Plague | Tags: affordable, art, artist, beauty, blogging, boring, box store, bronze, Bryce Canyon, businessmen, buying, canyon, Carolyn Henderson, culture, current events, daily life, entertainment, family, gold, hand knit, hikers, home, horizon, humor, industrial, life, lifestyle, limited edition, lost, lumberjack, mens department, middle age, mind-numbing, monotony, multi choice, national, news, ocean, pack, painting, park, path, personal, prints, punctuation, random, reality, relationships, restrooms, sales associate, shopping, signed, silver, socks, Steve Henderson, store, suit, test, underwear
I Am (amazon) Woman — Hear Me Roar
May 23rd, 2012
2 Comments
It was — literally — a small thing that I wanted, but my entire family gaped at me in horror, as if I had brightly announced, “I think I’ll sell my body on the streets to pick up a little pin money.” “I can’t believe you’re serious,” was the general consensus. “Where are your values?” [...]
Posted in humor, Middle Aged Plague | Tags: 1984, ads, Amazon, art, artist, blogging, book, books, Carolyn Henderson, children, classifieds, college, culture, current events, daily life, e-reader, electronic, entertainment, Facebook, family, Farenheit 451, game, George Orwell, home, humor, Ipod, K-Mart, Kindle, library, life, lifestyle, literary, middle age, motherhood, news, newspaper, Norwegian, painting, personal, play, pushing buttons, random, Ray Bradbury, relationships, rhinocerous, soul, Steve Henderson, Sunday, technology, text, thong, toddler, Wal-Mart, woman
The Formidably Frightening Car Alarm Fiasco
May 15th, 2012
2 Comments
So I’m sitting in the car when I hear the tell-tale snick of all the doors locking. “All the doors just locked,” Tired of Being Youngest announced helpfully from the back seat. “I noticed that.” We are vaguely disquieted. I’m in the passenger seat, holding the keys, waiting for the Son and Heir, my apprentice [...]
Posted in humor, Middle Aged Plague | Tags: alarm, alpine, apprentice, art, artist, back seat, beeping, birch, blogging, brain, button, calm, car, Carolyn Henderson, children, colic, cool, culture, current events, daily life, dandelions, doors, dream, driver, entertainment, family, fiasco, freeze, frightening, heir, home, humor, ignition, illusion, keypad, keys, life, lifestyle, lock, locust, loud, maple, middle age, motherhood, newborn, news, oak, over 40, painting, passenger, passenger seat, Paul Revere, personal, push button, relationships, Silence Dogood, son, spring, start the car, Steve Henderson, technology, Tired, unlock, walnut, wood, woodcarver, yarn, yarn shop, youngest
Reality TV Shows: Your Real Life Is So Much Better
May 9th, 2012
3 Comments
I’m sure that you’re all very nice people, but please don’t be offended if I say that I’m not interested in watching your lives on a reality show. You certainly don’t want to see mine. Like now — I’m sitting in front of the keyboard, typing. I’ll do this for hours, occasionally taking a break [...]
Posted in humor, Middle Aged Plague | Tags: action, art, artist, beautiful, blogging, boring, business, canyon, Carolyn Henderson, crying, culture, current events, daily life, doggie, dreams, eat dinner, entertainment, escapism, exciting, family, Hollywood, home, honorable, humor, joking, keyboard, laughing, laundry, lawn, life, lifestyle, lifting weights, light bulb, make believe, Mick Jagger, mowing, news, Norwegian Artist, ordinary, paint, painting, personal, rality, real, real life, relationships, show, Snookie, spirit, Steve Henderson, studio, take a walk, time, Tom Cruise, TV, typing, walk the dog, waste
Something Different: A Community of Independent Thinkers
May 3rd, 2012
1 Comment
I know it’s frustrating when people say this to you, but it’s actually a good sign: “No one else has ever had a problem with this.” This tiresome phrase, calculated to squash you down and shut you up from whatever observation you just made, is a subtly manipulative means of repressing dissent by middle [...]
Posted in humor, Middle Aged Plague | Tags: adminstration, African, argument, art, artist, Bilbo, birthday party, blogging, bureaucrat, business, care about what people think, Carolyn Henderson, city, community, complain, culture, daily life, different, dissent, educational, Ellis Island, encouragement, family, harbor, holiday, home, humor, Independence Day, independent, job, life, lifestyle, Lord of the Rings, manager, manipulation, middle age, middle manager, news, Norwegian, office, Oregon Trail, outsider, painting, people think, personal, plumber, political, politics, problem, public works, railroad, relationships, religious, riposte, sand, snappy comeback, social, social worker, Steve Henderson, tea, teachers, team player, think, thinkers, toilet, village to raise a child, work
